Sunday, December 31, 2006
Stevie
We cleaned 4 buildings today and between everyone of them I listened to Stevie tell me about his ideas about what he wants to do. It became deafening after a while. I know he has hopes and dreams, but he doesn't realize that these require money and a budget to get there and he just won't listen. I am tired. Will talk more later
New Years Eve
Good morning,
Today's is New Years eve and tommorow is my anniversary. It will be 9 years. Last night Stevie and I went to Michaels Arts and Crafts and Stevie, was looking at wedding stuff he could make or as we call it foofoo. He was upset that I did not stand there with him and he did not want to make it look like he was standing there himself. Oh well he finally got over it. I did buy a clay set where I can put and impression of Jenny's hand/feet and then it will make a picture frame, that was cool. Well I will talk again later.
Today's is New Years eve and tommorow is my anniversary. It will be 9 years. Last night Stevie and I went to Michaels Arts and Crafts and Stevie, was looking at wedding stuff he could make or as we call it foofoo. He was upset that I did not stand there with him and he did not want to make it look like he was standing there himself. Oh well he finally got over it. I did buy a clay set where I can put and impression of Jenny's hand/feet and then it will make a picture frame, that was cool. Well I will talk again later.
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Saturday morning
Hello,
Well we only cleaned on building last night, went to eat at the Mexican restaurant in White House, and then went to Movie Gallery. I bought Garfield, RV, Grandma's boy and Ice the Meltdown. I rented absolute zero and another movie about rock climbing on Everest I think. For some reason, movies about rock climbing, global warming are really interesting to me now. We will probably go get Stevie a new vacuum cleaner today. Well gotta go, Jenny is UP and she waits for no one :))
Well we only cleaned on building last night, went to eat at the Mexican restaurant in White House, and then went to Movie Gallery. I bought Garfield, RV, Grandma's boy and Ice the Meltdown. I rented absolute zero and another movie about rock climbing on Everest I think. For some reason, movies about rock climbing, global warming are really interesting to me now. We will probably go get Stevie a new vacuum cleaner today. Well gotta go, Jenny is UP and she waits for no one :))
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Stevie Rant
Hello,
Almost the entire time we cleaned tonight Stevie ranted about something. He states that he is in a creative box and he does not understand why I can't see that. He says he will die if he does not get out of the box. He says he doesn't want people to say when he dies that he cleaned a toilet really well. I told him that my nephews will just remember how angry he was all of the time. He said that if they were locked in their room all weekend, and not being allowed to leave, that they would be angry to. Because that is how he feels about being in his "box". He states that the only reason he started the janitor business is because that is the only business his family would support him on. He states it bores him to tears, that he has no creative out lit, it is strangling him. He wants a studio, so that he can be creative. I explained that before he can have a studio, he must get on a budget so that we can afford the house and building. He said he didn't understand how I could so unaffected by the lack of creativity. I explained that I had to be practical, he then said that we must break the practical bone so that I could be creative. Apparently the thought of a budget scares the sh&t out of him He states the he is so depressed, his life is bad, his sex life is boring and he cannot be creative. I have no idea what to tell him. Unless he goes by a budget then he is just plain stuck and telling him that is like giving a kid a shot. He also stated that he wanted to make enough money to buy all of his "toys", so I ask him how much would that take and he said he wasn't sure. He also wanted me to fill out a credit application so that he could see about buying a wood master (it is some kind of wood shop machinery). 1. I have no independent income. 2. I don't want it dinging my credit and 3. He has NO PLACE to put the thing if he did buy it!!!!!
He is truly driving me nuts and then I have to hear how Tony's wife supports him in everything he does. Tony has a few hobbies, art (I support most of Stevie's art work), guns (I support Stevie's gun hobby as much as possible) and sex with anyone he wants and he brings them home and Tony's wife doesn't care. Stevie has stated that he doesn't want to bring anyone home, he doesn't want Tony's lifestyle (Tony and Molly work a swingers club), but he wishes that I would support him more. I have NO IDEA WHAT HE WANTS FROM ME. I clean his toilets, because that is the job he chose, and I really think he needs to get over himself. I better go for now. I am going to make and effort to still post everyday.
good night
Leelee
Almost the entire time we cleaned tonight Stevie ranted about something. He states that he is in a creative box and he does not understand why I can't see that. He says he will die if he does not get out of the box. He says he doesn't want people to say when he dies that he cleaned a toilet really well. I told him that my nephews will just remember how angry he was all of the time. He said that if they were locked in their room all weekend, and not being allowed to leave, that they would be angry to. Because that is how he feels about being in his "box". He states that the only reason he started the janitor business is because that is the only business his family would support him on. He states it bores him to tears, that he has no creative out lit, it is strangling him. He wants a studio, so that he can be creative. I explained that before he can have a studio, he must get on a budget so that we can afford the house and building. He said he didn't understand how I could so unaffected by the lack of creativity. I explained that I had to be practical, he then said that we must break the practical bone so that I could be creative. Apparently the thought of a budget scares the sh&t out of him He states the he is so depressed, his life is bad, his sex life is boring and he cannot be creative. I have no idea what to tell him. Unless he goes by a budget then he is just plain stuck and telling him that is like giving a kid a shot. He also stated that he wanted to make enough money to buy all of his "toys", so I ask him how much would that take and he said he wasn't sure. He also wanted me to fill out a credit application so that he could see about buying a wood master (it is some kind of wood shop machinery). 1. I have no independent income. 2. I don't want it dinging my credit and 3. He has NO PLACE to put the thing if he did buy it!!!!!
He is truly driving me nuts and then I have to hear how Tony's wife supports him in everything he does. Tony has a few hobbies, art (I support most of Stevie's art work), guns (I support Stevie's gun hobby as much as possible) and sex with anyone he wants and he brings them home and Tony's wife doesn't care. Stevie has stated that he doesn't want to bring anyone home, he doesn't want Tony's lifestyle (Tony and Molly work a swingers club), but he wishes that I would support him more. I have NO IDEA WHAT HE WANTS FROM ME. I clean his toilets, because that is the job he chose, and I really think he needs to get over himself. I better go for now. I am going to make and effort to still post everyday.
good night
Leelee
Tired and Cold
Hello,
I have been cold for the last month and I can't seem to get over it, as always it is because I am fat. When I lose this weight my life will be perfect apparently. It is late in the day and we should have started cleaning 2 hours ago, but I have been asleep for 3 hours. AGGHH. I am going to see what kind of diet will boost my thyoid.
by for now
I have been cold for the last month and I can't seem to get over it, as always it is because I am fat. When I lose this weight my life will be perfect apparently. It is late in the day and we should have started cleaning 2 hours ago, but I have been asleep for 3 hours. AGGHH. I am going to see what kind of diet will boost my thyoid.
by for now
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
I am tired
Hello,
The diet is struggling, Stevie wants to take artistic pictures of naked people. Jenny is doing okay and the monthly visitor is here!!!! I am feeling just PEACHY. NOT!!! Sometimes I really wonder about Stevie, he has more business ideas than I can ever type and he gets very agitated if I do not go along with his every whim. He states that I will be a complete failure if I don't make a 2 year plan. I don't know what I want to do tomorrow, much less in 2 years. His latest thing is taking artistic pictures of naked people and incorporating their bodies into landscapes. He states that I am to narrow minded if I don't support him in this. If anyone feels that this is okay. Please respond, otherwise I have told him to go to Gatlinburg and take pictures of mountains that way. He states if I don't let him take these pictures, then I am inhibiting his creativity. I really do like most of his pictures especially the black and white, but then he has to bring in naked people and I just don't understand.
The diet is struggling, Stevie wants to take artistic pictures of naked people. Jenny is doing okay and the monthly visitor is here!!!! I am feeling just PEACHY. NOT!!! Sometimes I really wonder about Stevie, he has more business ideas than I can ever type and he gets very agitated if I do not go along with his every whim. He states that I will be a complete failure if I don't make a 2 year plan. I don't know what I want to do tomorrow, much less in 2 years. His latest thing is taking artistic pictures of naked people and incorporating their bodies into landscapes. He states that I am to narrow minded if I don't support him in this. If anyone feels that this is okay. Please respond, otherwise I have told him to go to Gatlinburg and take pictures of mountains that way. He states if I don't let him take these pictures, then I am inhibiting his creativity. I really do like most of his pictures especially the black and white, but then he has to bring in naked people and I just don't understand.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
2 days before Christmas
Hello,
Sorry I have not written in a couple of days it has been hectic. Stevie now wants to go back to doing gift baskets, floral and possible sell spa items. I really believe that he hates his janitorial work. He says it does not give him an artistic out lit.
My nephew Aaron spent Wednesday and Thursday with us and went home Friday morning. I will probably being paying for his therapy for years. Stevie gripes about everything and lots of things he shouldn't in front of the kids. He talks about how he doesn't want me watching Teresa's kids in the afternoon anymore and claims that gives us a late start cleaning, but there is no reason why he can't start sooner by himself at the most he would be alone for an hour. He then states that his mother is angry that I am watching the kids, because we now don't get started cleaning to late and we are late getting back. What she doesn't know is that on the days we have been really late, her son has been shopping, but of course he does not tell her that and let's me take all of the blame. She never tells me this stuff, she apparently tells Stevie. When we dropped Jenny off on Thursday night, he came out the car just angry talking about I had to stop watching Teresa's kids and I was the reason he was getting jumped and poor Aaron was in the back seat hearing all of this (he is one of Teresa's kids) and then Stevie gripes about how he doesn't have any money and before we clean all of our buildings, he goes to the game stop and spends $165 on games. I gave Teresa a brief explanation of what happened and assured her that I would continue to watch her children. She has not paid me yet, but I told her she could wait until after Christmas, to me it is not the end of the world, but Stevie has been screaming about everything lately. He woke up this morning and stated I was asinine because I had put Jenny's clothes in the dresser drawer. I really believe he is loosing it.
Everybody is taking a nap, I am going to haul the trash off and get some tape so that I can wrap gifts.
Sorry I have not written in a couple of days it has been hectic. Stevie now wants to go back to doing gift baskets, floral and possible sell spa items. I really believe that he hates his janitorial work. He says it does not give him an artistic out lit.
My nephew Aaron spent Wednesday and Thursday with us and went home Friday morning. I will probably being paying for his therapy for years. Stevie gripes about everything and lots of things he shouldn't in front of the kids. He talks about how he doesn't want me watching Teresa's kids in the afternoon anymore and claims that gives us a late start cleaning, but there is no reason why he can't start sooner by himself at the most he would be alone for an hour. He then states that his mother is angry that I am watching the kids, because we now don't get started cleaning to late and we are late getting back. What she doesn't know is that on the days we have been really late, her son has been shopping, but of course he does not tell her that and let's me take all of the blame. She never tells me this stuff, she apparently tells Stevie. When we dropped Jenny off on Thursday night, he came out the car just angry talking about I had to stop watching Teresa's kids and I was the reason he was getting jumped and poor Aaron was in the back seat hearing all of this (he is one of Teresa's kids) and then Stevie gripes about how he doesn't have any money and before we clean all of our buildings, he goes to the game stop and spends $165 on games. I gave Teresa a brief explanation of what happened and assured her that I would continue to watch her children. She has not paid me yet, but I told her she could wait until after Christmas, to me it is not the end of the world, but Stevie has been screaming about everything lately. He woke up this morning and stated I was asinine because I had put Jenny's clothes in the dresser drawer. I really believe he is loosing it.
Everybody is taking a nap, I am going to haul the trash off and get some tape so that I can wrap gifts.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Diet plans
I only had 2 diet cokes yesterday. This is a major improvement for the 2 liters I can usually drink in a day.
I have decided my diet will be going by the gastric bypass diet, without actualy having the surgery. My diet will officially begin on December 26. For 10 days I will do the pre op portion of the diet. This is the part were if you were having surgery you would be on a liquid diet to get yourself ready for the surgery. on 01/01/2007 I will start the phase one portion of the diet. This only last 3 days so from the 5th to the 7th I will be on clear liquids. From the 8th to the 15 I will be on full liquids. From the 16th of Jan. to the 16th of Feb I will be on pureed diet. From the 17th of Feb to the 17 of May I will be on the soft diet. I am still doing the research, but this is the plan for now.
I have decided my diet will be going by the gastric bypass diet, without actualy having the surgery. My diet will officially begin on December 26. For 10 days I will do the pre op portion of the diet. This is the part were if you were having surgery you would be on a liquid diet to get yourself ready for the surgery. on 01/01/2007 I will start the phase one portion of the diet. This only last 3 days so from the 5th to the 7th I will be on clear liquids. From the 8th to the 15 I will be on full liquids. From the 16th of Jan. to the 16th of Feb I will be on pureed diet. From the 17th of Feb to the 17 of May I will be on the soft diet. I am still doing the research, but this is the plan for now.
Friday, December 15, 2006
It's Friday
Well today is usually our busiest day. Over the weekend we usually have 9 or 10 buildings to clean so I won't get to post much. Nothing much has happened today, but Stevie is grumpy as usual and Jenny seems to be doing well
Thursday, December 14, 2006
STEVIE HAS CHANGED HIS MIND
Mom wasn't home, so I met Stevie at the Post office. I told him I wanted to eat as Las Palmas. He was all for eating Mexican. I that I was not interested in the whole spa idea and he said good, he really didn't want to go back to school to learn it anyway.
I told him I thought he should complete all of his photography classes (he had thought about just taking about 3 more and quitting) he said he would really like to get his degree. I really hope he finds what makes him happy. He was great with that. I took him by his school and they told him they still don't have his schedule yet. He can't take any night classes this time due to the amount of work he has with the janitorial now. He is hoping that they can work the schedule out. He really does not want to take photo journalism, creative writing or sports photography (he knows nothing about sports and has no desire to learn) but I told him that if he wanted to be a welled rounded photographer he needed that experience. He agree, but again it depends on the schedule
I told him I thought he should complete all of his photography classes (he had thought about just taking about 3 more and quitting) he said he would really like to get his degree. I really hope he finds what makes him happy. He was great with that. I took him by his school and they told him they still don't have his schedule yet. He can't take any night classes this time due to the amount of work he has with the janitorial now. He is hoping that they can work the schedule out. He really does not want to take photo journalism, creative writing or sports photography (he knows nothing about sports and has no desire to learn) but I told him that if he wanted to be a welled rounded photographer he needed that experience. He agree, but again it depends on the schedule
Quote of the day
Life is not like a Box of Chocolates*~*~* It's more like a Jar of Jalepino's...What you put into your mouth today might burn your @$$ tomorrow!!!
Diet today
I have decided that for now on I will only buy diet big K lemon lime and crystal light. I hope to eventually change over to water, but this is a step in the right direction. I watched Biggest Loser last night and it was quiet inspiring.
Stevie wants to start another business
Hello,
Yesterday was pretty boring. Took Jen to therapy, babysit the kids. Talked to Teresa for a few minutes and then came home.
Stevie has another business idea. As you will learn he has a ton of them. The latest is that he wants to open a spa. He got this idea by looking through a magazine. He saw a graph that showed that he could make a 60k a month doing this of course he was all for his.
Let me explain a little about Stevie. He has tried a lot of different business ideas. Gun smith, flower arranging, balloon art, photography, janitorial just to name few. I don't have a creative bone in my body and he gets angry if I do not jump head first into all of his projects. Like for instance, the spa idea, he came in last night and told me that I would never amount to anything because I had not looked up information on the spa stuff. I do admit that I have an extreme problem of not finishing anything and I take full responsibility for that, but neither does he. I dropped school, they had promised to have the medical coding available in the spring and it will not happen and I really did not want to do that anyway. I don't know what I want and that is a major problem.
He has gone for now to clean the post office and he said when he gets back we will look at the spa stuff. I am going to get Jen dressed and go to my mother's until time to babysit. I will be yelled at tonight, but at least I will get a few moments of peace and quiet.
Yesterday was pretty boring. Took Jen to therapy, babysit the kids. Talked to Teresa for a few minutes and then came home.
Stevie has another business idea. As you will learn he has a ton of them. The latest is that he wants to open a spa. He got this idea by looking through a magazine. He saw a graph that showed that he could make a 60k a month doing this of course he was all for his.
Let me explain a little about Stevie. He has tried a lot of different business ideas. Gun smith, flower arranging, balloon art, photography, janitorial just to name few. I don't have a creative bone in my body and he gets angry if I do not jump head first into all of his projects. Like for instance, the spa idea, he came in last night and told me that I would never amount to anything because I had not looked up information on the spa stuff. I do admit that I have an extreme problem of not finishing anything and I take full responsibility for that, but neither does he. I dropped school, they had promised to have the medical coding available in the spring and it will not happen and I really did not want to do that anyway. I don't know what I want and that is a major problem.
He has gone for now to clean the post office and he said when he gets back we will look at the spa stuff. I am going to get Jen dressed and go to my mother's until time to babysit. I will be yelled at tonight, but at least I will get a few moments of peace and quiet.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Forgot some people
I forgot my neighbors and my family in Kentucky, they make up a significant part of my life also
Barbara and Raymond, they live next door and work with Stevie. They are an older couple that have lots of cats and dogs, but are really good people and I don't think Stevie appreciates them enough
On the other side, we have James, Missy (they are a couple, know one seems to know if they are married, Missy was married for a time, but do not know if she managed to get a divorce) and her brother Jason. James and Missy also have a daughter that is about 3 months. They also have 3 pit bulls (lovely dogs, NOT!!!) Let me say that i have nothing against pit bulls but they are turning mean. More stress!!!! Also James and Jason work with Glenn as mechanics.
My family in Kentucky
My aunt, Patty
Her husband Dale
Her son Kevin and his wife Danielle and their son Ryan
Ryan lives with my aunt and uncle. Long story will tell more later
My granny. I love her dearly.
My uncle Ronnie
He has a daughter Rhonda and she is married, with a daughter, but we never see her.
Barbara and Raymond, they live next door and work with Stevie. They are an older couple that have lots of cats and dogs, but are really good people and I don't think Stevie appreciates them enough
On the other side, we have James, Missy (they are a couple, know one seems to know if they are married, Missy was married for a time, but do not know if she managed to get a divorce) and her brother Jason. James and Missy also have a daughter that is about 3 months. They also have 3 pit bulls (lovely dogs, NOT!!!) Let me say that i have nothing against pit bulls but they are turning mean. More stress!!!! Also James and Jason work with Glenn as mechanics.
My family in Kentucky
My aunt, Patty
Her husband Dale
Her son Kevin and his wife Danielle and their son Ryan
Ryan lives with my aunt and uncle. Long story will tell more later
My granny. I love her dearly.
My uncle Ronnie
He has a daughter Rhonda and she is married, with a daughter, but we never see her.
Here is John
Hello,
Here is John's my space account.
http://profile.myspace.com/dirtyfrench
and his website: http://www.modsheet.com/index.php
I am not sure what he is going to do when he gets older, but he's website seems to be doing pretty good
Here is John's my space account.
http://profile.myspace.com/dirtyfrench
and his website: http://www.modsheet.com/index.php
I am not sure what he is going to do when he gets older, but he's website seems to be doing pretty good
it's raining today!!!
It's raining today and i feel bad.
I guess today would be a good time for me to introduce to the people that make up my immediate life that way you will know who i am talking about.
husband is Stevie
daughter is Jenny
mother inlaw is Mrs. N
father inlaw is Pops
momma and daddy of course
My brother Scotty, he is a blog by himself
my sister Teresa
her husband, Scott
her kids, Issaac, Aaron and Jessie
my sister Amanda
Her husband Dale
her kids, Dustin, Nichole and Cody
Stevie's has 1 sister and 2 brothers
his sister Kathy
her huband Mike
Her kids are Dana and John (he is single and quite cute. Will post more on him later)
Dana's husband Marty
Her kids Kaylee and Jayce
his brother Jerry
his wife Debbie
There kids, Jeremy and Jeffrey, also both cute and single, in there 20s
his brother Glenn (another one that is a blog unto himself)
he has been married 5 times and is now currently single
He has 2 daughters, Keri and Emlia
Stevie's friend Tony
Tony has some many issues I could type a book on just him
Our friends Doug and Debbie, once again, many issues.
Dawn and Kemal, Dawn is the reason I found this website. She is a true good friend and really the only thing about my old job that I miss except for my friend Cathy.
I don't think i know any "normal" people, i am beginning to wonder about the company I keep.
I will post more later and let everyone know how the diet is going. I think I am quit the biggerst loser website, it is $20.00 a month and I am feeling better just blogging on here. This feels good to be able to ventilate
I guess today would be a good time for me to introduce to the people that make up my immediate life that way you will know who i am talking about.
husband is Stevie
daughter is Jenny
mother inlaw is Mrs. N
father inlaw is Pops
momma and daddy of course
My brother Scotty, he is a blog by himself
my sister Teresa
her husband, Scott
her kids, Issaac, Aaron and Jessie
my sister Amanda
Her husband Dale
her kids, Dustin, Nichole and Cody
Stevie's has 1 sister and 2 brothers
his sister Kathy
her huband Mike
Her kids are Dana and John (he is single and quite cute. Will post more on him later)
Dana's husband Marty
Her kids Kaylee and Jayce
his brother Jerry
his wife Debbie
There kids, Jeremy and Jeffrey, also both cute and single, in there 20s
his brother Glenn (another one that is a blog unto himself)
he has been married 5 times and is now currently single
He has 2 daughters, Keri and Emlia
Stevie's friend Tony
Tony has some many issues I could type a book on just him
Our friends Doug and Debbie, once again, many issues.
Dawn and Kemal, Dawn is the reason I found this website. She is a true good friend and really the only thing about my old job that I miss except for my friend Cathy.
I don't think i know any "normal" people, i am beginning to wonder about the company I keep.
I will post more later and let everyone know how the diet is going. I think I am quit the biggerst loser website, it is $20.00 a month and I am feeling better just blogging on here. This feels good to be able to ventilate
Monday, December 11, 2006
AGGHHH
I am back. I don't think I am cut out for babysitting. These kids want attention and today I just want to stay on the computer. This is not a good combination.
In about 15 minutes I have to leave to pick up my other nephew I babysit and then later on tonight I will work some with my husband. Agghh my husband is a whole story until himself. He is nearly impossible. He is a janitor that dreams of being an artist. How the 2 will mix I have no idea. With his work schedule, he needs to drop his photography classes completely, but that doesn't look like that is going to happen. I know in my gut that I will eventually have to leave him. I am hoping to lose a 100 pounds within the next 6 months. That will make things easier to find a new job. Let's be honest no one wants to hire someone as fat as I am and i am too ashamed to apply for a job anyway right now. But my daughters physical therapy should be completed by march/may and then I will start looking for a new job hopefully with the new me. I don't know if Stevie and I will last, he states that we have nothing in common and he wants to find someone that will doing something with him and i truly don't know if I am not interested in what he does or if the fat is keeping me from doing things. I have come to the realization that I can't fix my marriage, money matters, or just about anything else until I fix my self and that has to start today.
Will post more later.
In about 15 minutes I have to leave to pick up my other nephew I babysit and then later on tonight I will work some with my husband. Agghh my husband is a whole story until himself. He is nearly impossible. He is a janitor that dreams of being an artist. How the 2 will mix I have no idea. With his work schedule, he needs to drop his photography classes completely, but that doesn't look like that is going to happen. I know in my gut that I will eventually have to leave him. I am hoping to lose a 100 pounds within the next 6 months. That will make things easier to find a new job. Let's be honest no one wants to hire someone as fat as I am and i am too ashamed to apply for a job anyway right now. But my daughters physical therapy should be completed by march/may and then I will start looking for a new job hopefully with the new me. I don't know if Stevie and I will last, he states that we have nothing in common and he wants to find someone that will doing something with him and i truly don't know if I am not interested in what he does or if the fat is keeping me from doing things. I have come to the realization that I can't fix my marriage, money matters, or just about anything else until I fix my self and that has to start today.
Will post more later.
I am tired of being fat
Oh my gosh. I have never posted to anything like this before, but I have to get somethings off of my chest. I am over 350 pounds and I have been fat as long as i can remember and i am tired of it. I just joined the biggest loser club and I feel pretty good about it today, but of course i have started 100s of diets and not finished anything. I think that is my problem. I never finish anything and I am tired of it. I love my daughter and I want to see her grow up. I am tired of avoidning everday things because my butt is too BIG. I am just sick. I am being realistic that getting through the holidays will be hard, but come Jan. 1st I will not buy any more cokes!!! Drinking more water has to be my first priority.
I will post more later, i am trying to babysit and start this too and it is not working so well.
I will post more later, i am trying to babysit and start this too and it is not working so well.
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