I am back. I don't think I am cut out for babysitting. These kids want attention and today I just want to stay on the computer. This is not a good combination.
In about 15 minutes I have to leave to pick up my other nephew I babysit and then later on tonight I will work some with my husband. Agghh my husband is a whole story until himself. He is nearly impossible. He is a janitor that dreams of being an artist. How the 2 will mix I have no idea. With his work schedule, he needs to drop his photography classes completely, but that doesn't look like that is going to happen. I know in my gut that I will eventually have to leave him. I am hoping to lose a 100 pounds within the next 6 months. That will make things easier to find a new job. Let's be honest no one wants to hire someone as fat as I am and i am too ashamed to apply for a job anyway right now. But my daughters physical therapy should be completed by march/may and then I will start looking for a new job hopefully with the new me. I don't know if Stevie and I will last, he states that we have nothing in common and he wants to find someone that will doing something with him and i truly don't know if I am not interested in what he does or if the fat is keeping me from doing things. I have come to the realization that I can't fix my marriage, money matters, or just about anything else until I fix my self and that has to start today.
Will post more later.
1 comment:
You can do it!!! I have faith in you... It is possible that the reason you don't know if you like what Stevie likes is because you are self conscious about being overweight. Maybe once you drop 100 pounds, or even 50 pounds, a new you will start to come out. Keep me posted. I Love you and have fait in you!!! Keep positive.
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